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Elton John Surrenders in Gay Boycott, Declares Love of Dolce and Gabbana

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Rome, March 19, 2015 (AcuteMania.Net) — In case you have not heard, a couple of famous gay guys had a loud, drama-filled feud with another famous gay guy. That sound you hear is the sound of a well-established stereotype being solidly reinforced. Now I don’t want to say that gay men act like women because that would be “sexist” and “homophobic.” So, I’ll just tell you what happened and let their actions speak for themselves.

In an interview with the Italian magazine Panorama, the well-known fashion designers, Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana, said “we oppose gay adoptions.” In fact, they said that they oppose gay ‘marriage’ and adoption and that they find in vitro fertilization unnatural. They said that procreation “must be an act of love.”

Dolce said, “You are born to a mother and a father – or at least that’s how it should be.” Gabbana added, “The family is not a fad. In it, there is a supernatural sense of belonging.” Dolce stated, furthermore, that he opposed changing nature to create “children of chemistry, synthetic children, uteri for rent, semen chosen from a catalog.”

All of this outraged the gay singer, Elton John, and he called for a boycott of Dolce and Gabbana’s clothing. How dare someone say something that he doesn’t agree with? With respect to his IVF children, Elton John fumed, “How dare you refer to my beautiful children as ‘synthetic.'”

I would hate to reinforce another stereotype about gay men shopping, but after getting everyone on board for his boycott, Elton John was spotted carrying a Dolce and Gabbana bag less than 24 hours later.

When asked for comment, his spokesman said, “Yes he was carrying the bag but he hadn’t been shopping. And it should not detract from their original message or the boycott.” Sure thing, Elton John.

Well, today it seems that all is well with Elton John and he declared that he loved Dolce and Gabbana and that his whole band was wearing it. Perhaps he finally looked up the definition of the word “synthetic” and realized that is wasn’t so much an insult as it was an accurate description.

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March 19, 2015 at 8:09 pm
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